101 Things To Do Before You're Five
by Sally Norton

Release Date: 25th Feb 2010
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 978 0 6709 1794 5
RRP: £9.99

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The classic gift for any adult who's had the unfortunate experience of having a child...

This delicate, little book promises hours of fun as you explore the world of parenthood from a humorous, if somewhat cynical point of view. The early years are supposed to be a mixed blessing: the toughest on your sleep-deprived brain, but the time when your offspring are at their cutest – a necessity if you aren’t to strangle the little blighters!

Norton has compiled a surprisingly accurate and detailed list of 101 things to expect from your new bundle of joy – from birth to five years. Conveniently split into age group sections for easy reference; not only do you get the quick quips, she also offers additional details that are not only often hilarious, but provide a startlingly truthful insight into the joys and trials of parenthood.

Not that every one of the 101 things is gold – some fall a little flat, but that only highlights the genius of the ones that really strike a chord. Our favourites are: “22. Play with the box that a big, expensive toy came in”, “42.Get something stuck up your nose”, “47. Get mummy a row of seats of an aeroplane”, “53. Become a collector”, “56. Call daddy by his first name”, “58. Find the ‘sweet spot’ in a double bed”, “71.Divide and rule”, “76. Say it like it is” and “100. Catch daddy making a hollow threat”. You’ll enjoy the short introductions to each age group too – full of delightful observations as “...the rigid body position that’s been proved to prevent 97 percent of adults from clipping a baby into a buggy...” and “Don’t worry about offending anyone – you’re too young to know about tact”.

The perfect gift to scare parents-to-be (but make sure you give it to them after they’ve excitedly told you they’re pregnant) or to reassure old hands that their kids’ escapades are, after all, perfectly ‘normal’.

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